It's been 18 months since my mom died. It feels like longer and sometimes like no time at all. She has missed so much; birthdays, holidays, successes, failures, and Emmett's whole life. It makes my heart sad to know he will never know her. He will know the memory of her of course. Her legacy, but most of the time that doesn't seem good enough. Tonight I just sat cuddling with Emmett talking to him about his Grandma Karen. It made me happy and sad at the same time. I don't feel like I was doing her justice though.
I miss being able to call her on my way home from work to chat, or when I was bored, or had some random question about cooking or sewing or health or whatever. It's weird because since she's passed so much has changed even the little things. My phone was destroyed, and I had to hand enter all my numbers. It's no longer mom and dad's house just dad's house. My mom's number is no longer in my phone. Her closet and bathroom at home are now cleaned out (my sister and I finished it this Christmas). Everything is just different. Time continues to march on I suppose. That's how life works. The only comfort I do have is that she is with Jesus. I know she's happy and without pain. I couldn't ask for more on that end. She was in so much discomfort those last few years and probably a lot of the years in between too.
Well, at least the time we had with her was awesome. We have a ton of great memories. And I don't think we will be forgetting her anytime soon.
No comments:
Post a Comment